Why am I such a sissy boy? How do I stop?

I'm only 19 but I've already been wearing panties and baby dolls for ages.I love feminine clothing, i.e. with bows, frills, sequins, lace, satin, etc.and hate having to wear male clothing. I am very submissive and obedient towards women. I love pleasing them by doing housework and running errands. I have never had sex or even had a romantic partner. I am also very attracted to big, strong alpha males. I have many female friends but I am considered one of the girls. They even change in front of me saying "it doesnt count with you". They openly acknowledge my lack of masculinity and tell me that I am effeminate (not in mean way) and will not hesitate to ask me to run errands or do chores. I feel guilty but all this turn me on so much. I loved being degraded and punished or alternately being treated like a little girl or a puppy. How can I stop all this and be "normal"? I dont want to just embrace this, because I know my life will suck if I do. I dont want to spend my life being hopelesly attracted to women that humiliate me, slap me, and use me. How do I stop all this????